| He�s been
here before. Just
twice. Here on this street, staring at that pub; seeing the white light, hearing the music, staring at Nelson�s smiling face and winking. The first time he didn�t quite believe it even though he�d known the truth. He�d said goodbye to Alex, Shaz, Chris and Ray. But ten years earlier he�d said goodbye to Sam. See, he forgot for a time; for a long, long time. He lived this life like it was all real. He became Gene Hunt � the Guv � the man he�d always dreamt of being. For a time. Then along came Sam Tyler. Mad, crazy, beautiful Sam. Who turned his life upside down and inside out. Who made him remember. Sam fought him tooth and nail to get home, and when he finally got there he gave it all up to come back. No one had ever done that before. So he�d told Sam everything, and Sam had stayed as long as he could until one day he�d said he had to leave and so reluctantly Gene had brought him here. They�d stood on the very spot Gene�s standing on now, tears in their eyes. Sam had said, �I love you�, and Gene had gathered him up, held on tight and said, �you too�. He didn�t try to stop him from leaving; they�d had seven years, any fantasies he might have had about it being forever were just that. Sam had kissed him much like Alex did all those years later, only with the passion of many shared nights, not just one aborted one, and Gene had watched him wave goodbye, and vanish into the light. He doesn�t know what year it is now. But it�s been getting more and more difficult to keep up the pretence and he thinks maybe, just maybe, he�s ready to let go. Nelson�s at the door. He can hear the music � David Bowie, Life On Mars � the song Sam always used to listen to. It was playing when Sam left, and when the others left too. The light looks brighter somehow, and there�s a warmth spilling out from the open door that hasn�t been there before. He takes a step forward, two steps, and Nelson smiles. �Sam�s waiting for you,� he says, �they all are. Waiting for the Guv.� It feels right now and he walks towards the barman, reaches out and shakes his hand. He can smell cigarette smoke and whisky, and he knows it�s over. But it feels like it�s just beginning. |